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Let's attend a Bohri wedding
Post-wedding: After the Nikah , the Meher amount is given to the guardian ( wali ) of the bride. Two members of the groom's party go with the Toran to the place where the bride is sitting and present it to her, and the bride's family reciprocates with gifts to the two persons. Toran consists of misri , coconut, beetle leaves, seven full pieces of supari , flower garland, rich garments and gold ornaments.
Another important ritual after the Nikah is the Salaam , the paying of respects to elders by kissing their hands, which the bride and groom performs to their mother-in-laws. This is a mark of accepting her as one's own mother and paying her similar respects. The mother-in-law reciprocates by offering rich gifts. When the bride ceremonially does Salaam to her mother-in-law, she carries a red kerchief with one of its corners wrapped and tied with a silver coin, one coconut, two full pieces of betel-nut and a certain amount of Salaam in money.
Post the wedding, both sides hold wedding feasts which are occasions of veritable festivities. Before the feasts, majlis (religious meeting of women) and darees (of men) are held to invoke the presence of the Almighty in all events. The reception of the bride at the venue of the feast is a rite in itself. The mother-in-law offers the bride pannu ; that is a welcome gift to the bride which is a decorative basket in which there are - two coconuts, two flower garlands, a small quantity of rice as a good omen, pan-betel nut, one set of rich clothing, a necklace, sweets and a gift for the bride's best maid. A pair of sandals for the bride is also placed besides the basket, the pair that she will wear to her husband's place.
After the feast, which is usually fit for a king even if low-budgeted, the bride's maternal uncle performs the chhera chheri ritual which consists of tying a red duppatta of the bride to the end of the shawl of the groom to symbolise their everlasting union. The bride is then sent away to her husband's place with lots of tears and well-wishes.
Most of these rituals happen with the prior intimation and approval of the abiding priest hence ensuring divine acceptance and existence of the marriage. Set within its own context this community continues to thrive with its niche traditions rooted in Islamic values. A reflection of what India holds within her heart.
Read about other Wedding Rituals
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Fatema Kagalwala
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