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Attend a Bengali wedding
Know all about the customs, traditions and attire
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The wedding ceremony
Bengali weddings are typically conducted in the evening or night. The bride is carried on a piri (a low wooden stool) by her brothers and is taken round the groom in seven complete circles, which signifies that they are wound up securely to each other.
The bride and groom then exchange garlands while the purohit chants mantras. After garlanding one another the bride and the groom are made to look at each other in front of all the assembled invitees. This exchange of loving glance is called shubho drishti.
Her paternal or maternal uncle gives the bride away before a yagna as the fire God, Agni, is regarded as a witness. This particular ritual is called sampradan. Then the groom applies sindoor (vermilion) on the forehead of the bride to mark the end of the marriage ceremony. The bride then covers her head with a new saree offered by the groom as ghomta or veil. However, in case of the Bengalis from East Bengal, the groom adorns the forehead of his bride with sindoor the next morning. He does this by looking into a mirror. This ritual is called bashi biye.
Bashor Ghar
After the marriage, there is revelry and merry-making and the couple is served dinner. Jokes, songs and poetry recitals by friends and relatives keep the couple awake all through the night. However, for the Bengalis from East Bengal this ritual does not exist.
Day 3: Bidaai
This ceremony marks the departure of the bride to her new home. The newly weds are blessed by the elders.
Bou Baran
This ritual is performed to welcome the bride to her new home. The groom's elder brother's wife holds a plate containing lac dye and milk under the bride's feet. Having imprinted the soles of her feet thus, she leads her by the arm into the house. The elders of the house bless the newly weds. There are very interesting rituals attached to this event. The new bride is taken to the kitchen to witness that milk is overflowing. This is an indication of abundance. Then there are a lot of good-natured fun and games between the couple. The bride and groom are not supposed to meet that that night as it is called Kaalratri.
Day 4: Bou Bhat
It is during this ceremony that the bride has her first meal in the home of her in-laws. The girl cooks and serves all the members of her husband's family. This ceremony is followed by a reception in the evening, hosted by the groom's father.
Phool Sajja
The last of the wedding ceremonies, this occasion sees the bride in a new saree and the groom in a new dhoti and kurta and adorned with flowers. Their nuptial bedroom is beautifully decorated with flowers, which is why the term, phool sajja. The flowers, clothes and sweets for the occasion usually arrive as gifts from the bride's house. After a bit of playful teasing they are left together alone in their room to enjoy conjugal bliss.
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