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The post-wedding syndrome
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In her heart, Urmi knew that she couldn't blame Deep. His beliefs and behaviour were consistent. It was Urmi, whose interpretations had changed. If she once equaled possessiveness as sign of love, it was her mistake, not Deep's.
People say this happens. Many things that look and feel very romantic during courtship become the reasons to fight after marriage. "You are always late", just see how different they sound when uttered by a boyfriend and a husband.
Sure it happens. It's commonly called the Post-Wedding Marriage Syndrome. The highs of a new relationship overshadow real attitudes and concerns. When the 'wedding' is over and its time to begin a marriage couples find them at a loss on how to cope.
But then what? Divorce? Separation? Or a long, unhappy marriage?
It doesn't necessarily have to be any of the above. As old fashioned as it may sound, sometimes one has to adjust - or rather readjust. Once the initial euphoria wears off and reality sets in, things may not always look so rosy.
But then life is not all rosy - why expect marriage to be so?
The thing to remember is that marriage is not always about marrying the right person… it is often about BEING the right person.
Deep may need to adjust some of his attitudes. But Urmi will have to do the same if the two are to make a success of it.
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Varsha Pathak
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