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Kitchen Wars During Festivals
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 A large percentage of the Indian population wouldn't mind even if they died eating during the happy festive season. However, recent times have found that there are people, very few perhaps, who prefer to diet even during the festivals.
Well, during normal circumstances, to each his own. But what happens when personal food preferences escalate into war because the two people with a difference of opinion work in the same kitchen? And especially so, if they happen to be mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?
Recently a well known, rather well hyped dietician and nutritionist (now what is the difference between two?) wrote in a newspaper about the hazards of indiscriminate eating during Diwali.
Avoid sugary sweets, avoid fried snacks, avoid items made with maida, avoid the use of excessive ghee and oil in cooking, avoid over eating... her long list of 'don'ts' was enough to put a damper on any food lover's mood. All this unappealing advice and during Diwali to boot? Now come on...
The old lady of a family, who read this, was sure (as always) that the so-called nutrition expert was influenced by the Western culture. No decent-minded and sweet-tongued Indian would dream of celebrating a festival without sweets and savouries loaded with ghee, sugar and dry fruits. The thought of avoiding rich food during Diwali would tantamount to blasphemy for the traditional folks.
And let's be honest, how many amongst us don't like these food traditions? Jalebis on Dussera, chikki during kite festivals, paysam at Onam, laddoo on Ganesh Chaturthi, til-gud laddoo on Gudi Padwa, and sewaiya on Id... no festival is complete without some special foods associated with it. And Diwali is the mother of all where festive food is concerned. Lights are in, light food is out.
True to the Indian tradition, the mother-in-law believes that sweetmeats are not only for the family but to be shared amongst relatives, friends, neighbours and guests. What is Diwali if you don't send or receive at least a box of sweets?
Now the problem is that the so-called western idea of eating healthy even during festivals has entered her own house in the form of her daughter-in-law. She feels that people should eat sensibly and stop stuffing themselves with calories and cholesterol-laden food - festival or no festival. She even refuses to cook the fried and fattening during Diwali and is all set to stop her family from consuming 'trash'.
"My father-in-law is diabetic and naturally my husband is predisposed to the disease. He loves rich food and given a chance, would pig out on sweets. I care for him and that is the reason I want to keep him away from culinary temptations.
I respect my mother in law and know that she loves us. But that doesn't mean I have to put up with all her unhealthy habits," says the young woman who otherwise has no problem with her ma-in-law.
Some two years back, when the issue was raised, the older lady had the final word. She didn't force the daughter-in-law to cook or eat 'Diwali specials'. But she would not be stopped from doing it all either. She prepared all the traditional festive items like laddoos, kaju katli, karanjis, chakli, chiwda and sev and ensured everyone had a feast. Of course, the young woman had a chance to utter, "I told you so" when right on the Diwali day her husband had an upset stomach. Not that it made much of a difference!
Deciding to take a middle line, this year the daughter-in-law bought some recipe books on how to prepare festive foods with less ghee, oil and sugar. The old lady took one look and was aghast. Baked puri... oil free chiwda... sugarless barfi... Was this for real?
She simply said, "If you wish, we can try some of this, but the rest of the things will be done traditional way. After all Diwali comes just once a year. And if rich food didn't harm the previous generation, it is not going to kill us now. Period."
Nobody knows what is going to happen now. No doubt that this is a happy and united family. Saas and bahu get along pretty well with each other - until the kitchen war begins during festivals. Then it's not just the cooking that causes the heat in the kitchen.
On hearing this, a wise one said, let the old lady prepare all the sweets the way she wants but ask the family members to restrain from over eating.
Good advice. But is it possible to follow? After all... No one can eat just one!
Now, the questions that arise are simple:
- Who will win this kitchen war?
- Can you suggest a compromise that will make everyone happy?
- Is the mother-in-law being unreasonable and unhealthy?
- Does the daughter-in-law need to 'chill'? It is Diwali after all!
Read more: Festive Special
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Varsha Pathak
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