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How do I overcome social phobia?
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Dr. Tushar Guha
Is the Founder Managing Director of Nrityanjali - the Institute of Performing Arts, Education, Personality Development and Management Services. He is also a practicing Psychologist, Counsellor, Educationist & Corporate Trainer. Have a question? Click here...
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I just want to be me
Shireen asks,
I have an anger problem. I think guys are intimidated by me and find it difficult to ask me out. Some who do ask me out are not 'man enough for me', they don't ask me directly. What can I do to change it? I do not want to turn into one of those girls who turn mushy around guys to win their love. I just want to be me.
Dear Shireen,
Make yourself approachable, have an open attitude and relax. You are too conscious about all these. Try to calm your mind through yoga, meditation. Also try to analyse why you get angry. Anger will be controlled
I lack confidence
Rukhsana Khan asks,
Sometimes I feel that I am not moving forward in life. I seem to be at a stand still. Something is holding me back. I feel I lack confidence and have not tried enough to make things happen. I don't know why I have not met any person to settle down with. So many things go through my mind. Please help.
Dear Rukshsana,
You are very restless. You need to overcome your mind. Can you practice breathing exercises, asaanas & yoga? Also please indulge in hobbies that you would love to do.
Leave a good impression
Mamoon Rashid asks,
I am 27 and a Sales Manager. I wish to improve my personality, not to impress the opposite sex, but for the growth of my career in sales. We face hundreds of people every day. How can I leave my impression over all of them?
Dear Mamoon Rashid,
A lot of details will have to be worked on in the area of personality development which include: inter-diplomatic skills and improving attitude. Your physical appearance, mental analysis, communication skills, reading habits etc. Is it possible for you to join any behavioural courses? You need it. Check on websites. It is too complex to explain anything here.
Habit of complaining
Khadija A Aryee asks,
I have the habit of complaining about anything I find wrong. Though the thing is naturally wrong people seem not to bother. Please can you help me stop this habit?
Dear Khadiya,
Whenever you find that things are irritating you, please write down the feelings. Read the writing immediately and again after one hour. Then tear off the writing. This process will help you gradually.
Social phobia
Sonali Ghosh asks,
I am a 29 year old housewife and a mother of a 2 year old. I get tense when I meet new people. It is getting worse after we moved to UK. I can not speak fluent English. Please tell me how to cope with this social phobia?
Dear Sonali,
With all seriousness, please look at yourself in the mirror. Dress up well and in front of the mirror. Alone. See yourself in different angles. Speak as if some one is in front of you. Observe and appreciate yourself. This may appear silly, but it works. Also if possible, find time to read good books and also write your feelings and read them. Please do not preserve your writings.
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