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10 things that a woman looks for in a man to marry
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Ruby K Bhatia
Ruby K Bhatia is a grooming expert and conducts seminars on Personality Development throughout India. She covers topics like self-confidence, public speaking, grooming and manners. Have a question? Click here...
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Abhi asks,
One of the best lines for women is "Beauty with brain" isn't it? Now tell me the ten most important qualities, an educated woman tries to finds in a man to marry him and ten things she doesn't look for?
Dear Abhi,
Aaahhh!! Very good question. Interesting… Let me think. Okay, here goes:
Stability
The first quality that every woman looks for in her man (consciously or unconsciously) is a sense of stability. This not only means financial stability, but also an inner sense of stability that comes from being a balanced and focused person. A strong, stable husband is the foundation of a good future for the family-to-be. So this quality includes emotional and mental stability.
Confidence
A man who is confident about being a good human being is very attractive. Please note, I am not talking about someone who is totally desultory yet absolutely confident of his desultoriness. This is total misuse of confidence. Confidence must be based on goodness in order to be worthwhile. However, confidence must be tempered with humility. A truly self-confident person is devoid of inferiority and superiority complexes. And remember, a superiority complex is nothing but an inferiority complex trying hard to defend itself.
Self-Respect
Perhaps a better word for confidence is self-respect. Nothing is more appealing than someone who has a clear concept of his own identity and is full of dignity and self-respect. A person who respects himself can respect others. A sense of pride in one's existence and duties in life is magnetic.
Empathy
This is often termed "sensitivity" by women. A sensitive guy is one who is compassionate, who cares for the other person, who can understand where she is coming from and what she is going through. But guys have to work hard at this one as it doesn't usually come naturally to them. This is because the masculine aspect of human nature is reason-dominated, whereas the feminine aspect is feeling-dominated. Making a conscious effort to develop both aspects equally will go a long way in making marital relationships more successful.
Sense of direction
Traditionally, it was the man who "wore the pants" in the family- meaning that the man of the house usually led the way. This is changing now as the wife and husband make joint decisions for their mutual welfare. However, it is very important that the husband still retains his clarity of thought and is able to provide a sense of direction when required. Let us not undermine inherent, natural traits that prove beneficial for the family. In other words, "When you got it, use it!"
Family values with an adventurous spirit
A woman always loves a man who inwardly puts family first. But this doesn't mean that you have to become a boring old "Uncle"!! Keep your sense of youthfulness alive by striving to develop your own identity and being sensibly reckless in life. So family values balanced with adventurousness is very appealing.
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