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Celebrities » Love-talk » Vikram-acharya-060221
Human relationships are very complex. Does a formula for a perfect relationship exist? How essential are love, lust, aggression, jealousy and passion in a relationship?

Love and lust go together

Vikram Acharya plays the lead in 'Mahi Ve', a daily soap on Sab Channel, and Akki in the serial Dil Kyaa Chahta Hai. He defies the belief that there is a formula for a perfect relationship. When asked, he had the perfect answer: "There is no formula for a perfect relationship. If there would have been a formula then we would not have seen relationships just breaking up, there would not have been any divorces and separations."

Vikram Acharya

Vikram Acharya
If there is romance but no love, the relationship will not last. Love is the prime necessity in a relationship without which the relationship is temporary. Love is something that keeps your relationship going. If the person is just with you for your money and just because you look beautiful, that relationship has no life, it will die off soon. But if the relationship has a blend of everything like love, likeness, respect, craze, empathy, understanding, trust, sacrifice; then that relationship lasts forever.

Lust is necessary and is very important to keep your relationship alive till the last moment. It goes without saying that love and lust go together, otherwise your relationship withers. There are two ways to look at it. For some, love comes first and then lust and for some they go together. I think all those who say that lust is not so important if there is love are not bold enough to speak out their hearts. The physical need, which is natural and important, can not be ignored.

It arises out of insecurity and over-possessiveness. When it crosses the limit it kills the relationship. That means you don't trust your partner. You feel insecure thinking your partner might find a better match. It later makes you suspicious, and you doubt your partner. May be because you think secretly or feel guilty that your partner might be doing what you did. You feel jealous because you are insecure. Of course, you can not totally let go and relax thinking your partner will never leave you, but too much jealousy will only bring problems like emotional moments, scared moments and tensed moments. Jealousy, if it's healthy, is good.


Again, aggression arises out of insecurity, lack of communication, over-possessiveness; when you stop respecting the opposite person's values, points of view. Just because you are in a relationship, you don't own each other. You can not get away by saying anything to each other, disregard, disrespect each other. There is a limit to everything. Sometime we fail to understand or accept each other's point of view and we argue. This leads to fights, ego hassles and then disaster in a relationship. Initially, I might try to communicate and sort out but if I feel that my partner is crossing the limit, like if the argument or the fight has gone up to abusing and lifting hands, then it's a signal for me to quit. I would simply walk out of the relationship. I'll just set myself and my partner free because it would not make sense staying together when there is no respect left.

It is essential in a relationship. If you are not passionate about each other you start looking out for passion in some other person, and that is when, slowly, infidelity creeps in. You have to show that you are passionate. Some people don't feel necessary, but sometimes it does make a difference when you surprise your partner with things. Take her for a surprise romantic dinner, one day give her just a rose, send her flowers, call her in the middle of the night. Passion is such an emotion you can not just speak out; you need to do small things to keep that fire of love burning inside you.

Sabina S Mary
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